You'd think I'd have put more thought into what I want for my birthday. Well... I do know what I want, but what I want generally consists of things I can't afford on my own, so I don't want to burden other people with the expenses.

Such as... car repairs.

Such as... a new computer.

Such as... a mini-fridge.

My mom's suggested getting me a new computer for my birthday, but it seems like something I don't really need. I mean, yeah... there have been problems with it. It gets laggy every once in a while, either my monitor or my video card is on its way out, and the keyboard strangely seems to have multiple keys mapped to the same function, and multiple functions to the same key. I'm dreadful at anything beyond the very basics of computer maintenance, so at 4 years old, this thing is acting like a dinosaur.

But I'm not really sure what I use my computer for that would really require any major upgrade. And I don't want to encourage myself to stay at home/stay up late any more than I already do.

And it's really more than I deserve. I don't know how much brand new computers cost these days, but even one that wasn't top of the line would have to cost upwards of $500, right? They're already paying my tuition and everything. I know they make way more than I do, so it's not like it'd break them like it would me, but it just seems like a lot of money to spend on a birthday.

I want something I wouldn't expect. I want something that will improve the quality of my life in a way I wouldn't think I needed.

Like these. Oh man, those rock.

I guess I'd rather get a lot of small gifts than I would one big one. I want to get novelty items, and be taken out to dinner, and be taken out for drinks, and just be treated well for a day. It's been a while since our family treated birthdays like day-long events... now it all seems to be huddled into this two-hour meeting where we go out to the restaurant of the birthday-ee's choice, come home to cake and presents, and we're done with it. And it's just as disappointing for other people's birthday's as it is mine. It's like nobody has the energy for anything anymore, which is depressing.

Five more days. And I haven't told anybody anything that I want.